


I will love you in every lifetime

by OliveBranch_10



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Falling In Love, M/M, Reincarnation, takes place after s2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-01
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-10-13 14:49:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10515924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OliveBranch_10/pseuds/OliveBranch_10
Summary: I'm aware right now that Christopher Larkin is Korean but back when i wrote this, they told us that Monty had a chinese background because he was originally from the Shenzhen part of the ship. Hence the reason i thought Monty was Chinese.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm aware right now that Christopher Larkin is Korean but back when i wrote this, they told us that Monty had a chinese background because he was originally from the Shenzhen part of the ship. Hence the reason i thought Monty was Chinese.

The first time you see him is in the summer of 1839. You’re trading with this woman and you don’t understand shit what she’s saying. But suddenly behind the woman a boy appears. He’s small, couldn’t be older than five and he’s walking on his bare feet and his trousers are only holding together by a few strings. A beggar probably and you’ve always been told by your colonel that you shouldn’t pay any attention to those kids but you smile at him and the boy hides his face behind his long hair and starts muttering to the woman and pointing at the silk you want. “Gái” he says and points at the silk again. You nod. “yes that one.”  
He follows you home, all the way to the British embassy. Only when you wish to enter he pulls your leg. “Wo ái nî” you sigh. “I don’t understand a word you’re saying kid.” Your heart clenches when you see his big eyes, thick dark hair keeps falling in them and he shakes his head like a confused dog. He repeats the same words and you say them back, he grins as if you’re giving him a big gift and you decide to look up the words. Later you find out that they mean ’ I love you ’   
For three weeks you let the kid follow you around, he’s chatting in Chinese and you catch a few words that you know so you nod along as if you know exactly what he’s saying. You find him a pleasant company compared to the boys back at the base, who are always complaining. You like the little boy. 

When your colonel declares war to the savages, you are expected to follow and you do, but first you go outside to look for your boy and  he’s sitting near the tree a few miles from the embassy. “Yùnxíng” you say. The words strange and foreign in your mouth. “Run, hide!” His eyes are confused and brimming with tears. “Yùnxíng please!” He nods and hugs you, you hug him back. You die three hours later.

~

The second time you meet him, it’s 1883 and he’s traveling as an old man. You recognise him immediately and that scares you. You’ve never met someone from your past life or anyone who remembers his past lives. You sit in front of him and he smiles at you. You nod back, your hands are shaking and you wipe them on your pants. You shouldn’t be nervous but you have hopes. “have we met before boy?” His accent is thick and he probably always worked on the railway, shipped from a foreign land to work on foreign ground. Same as your father’s fate, you’re lucky they say for being an half-black and to be birthed by a white woman. “I don’t know Sir.” You whisper back, afraid that you’ll ruin the small time you have with the elder version of your boy. “Perhaps in an other lifetime.” He says and grins at you, his face full of wrinkles but he still has the same twinkling eyes that remind you of the stars against the dark sky. You smile back. He leaves at the next stop and without reason your heart aches. 

You live a long and empty life.

~

You don’t meet him in your third life and neither in your fourth or fifth and you start to lose hope that one day faith would be kind. You’ll never forget your sixth lifetime, the shortest but most angry one you’ve ever had. 

You’ve joined the protest of 1964, you’re shouting and you can feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins. Your fighting for rights you wished  you had in  every lifetime, nothing will take this moment from you. They’ve arrested you twice already but luck has been on your side so far and you keep marching on. Out of nowhere a flash of black hair catches your eye. It’s him, he’s young, but only a few years and that’s the first time in centuries and you stop in your tracks. 

He stares at the marching people, standing next to his father on the side of the road. As if he feels you staring he looks up and smiles at you.   
You feel brave enough to walk over to them. His face flushes and you grin. “What’s your name?” You never known his name before and you wonder if this will be the only time you’ll have the chance to ask. “Shane.” He mumbles still looking flustered. His father frowns and places an hand on his shoulders, he looks at you as if he’s daring you to stop, but you’ve never backed down from a fight. “That’s his American name.” Nodding you look at him again. “Well, what’s your real name?” He smiles and you want to treasure it forever. “Shān.” And he says it so proudly that you can’t help to smile back. “Mountain.” You say. “A fitting name.” He stares at you. “Nate lets go!” You don’t know who calls you but you want to curse even though you know that the cause is important. Dragging your feet you slowly walk back to the crowd. “Hey Shān, meet me at Daisy’s tomorrow!” He nods and you smile, running back to the crowd. You never make it to Daisy’s. You die in a ditch later that same day, killed by scared white folks who will never get punished for taking your destiny in their hands.

~

You’ve turned seventeen last week and you know that you’ll meet him soon, it’s always the same deal. You’ve prayed, begged, cursed and screamed at the higher heavens that kept punishing you like this. It’s 2012 and you’re sick. The doctors gave you up a year ago but you’re fighting at least until you’re seventeen you tell them, keep me alive until I’m older than seventeen. They don’t understand the specific number but they admire your fight. Your mother gets you to the best hospital in town, mutters that if your father would be alive, he would know what to do. You always feel empty when she mentions him, there has never been a father in your life. You can only remember one vaguely from your forth lifetime but even those memories fade, only those of your boy, the old man, and Shān seem to stick out as bright memories and the moment you die. 

The new hospital is okay, you tell you mother that because you want her to be happy, at least the food is good and your nurse seems to like you, wheeling you to the gardens where you wait all day in hope that you’ll meet him, your hopeful that you’ll meet him before you die. Lucky for you, you do. He’s your new doctor, Dr Yán. He smiles at you when he enters. The brightest doctor you’ve had so far.

“Yán how old are you?”

“I don’t see the importance of age Nathan.” 

You nod and look at him, he writes something in your chart and he frowns, you don’t like that because his smile lights up your room and it’s the one that keeps you going for now, he won’t ever love you but he cares and that’s enough.

“Will you finish telling me about that book you read anytime soon Doc? I’ve been wondering about the ending for weeks.” He smiles again and you want to do a small victory dance, you don’t do it of course but it’s a close call.

“I’m certain that I’ll finish it tonight, I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

You never find out the ending, you fall asleep that night and you don’t wake up. He comes to your funeral for the first time in lifetimes but you don’t know it. He tells the ending to a grave without it’s spirit.

~

You don’t meet him in your next lifetime and your glad, the world is tumbling and you don’t know whose your enemy and whose your friend. The air is simmering and bombs drop everywhere. You die soon, it’s a painful death - crushed by a building - but it’s less painful than the radiation that kills everyone three months later.

~

When you lie in your bed and you wonder if faith has any rules to follow through, if there are loopholes and flaws because you certainly think so. The ark is a metal cage and a lifetime in which you’ll never meet him anyway. You’re certain of it. There is no new city to discover, no new place to go to and no strangers to bump into. This lifetime is different from all the others, your mother died giving birth and you now have a dad, it’s new but you like it but it doesn’t offer you release. The pent up feeling, the unease in your bones makes you reckless. It’s why you’ve started stealing and the reason that you got caught. This lifetime isn’t worth it, you often mumble when you’re alone in your cell. You think your waiting, a pause between one life and the next. 

And suddenly you’re getting send to the ground. All hundred of you.

First you think that this will be your end, you’ve never lived long anyway and you doubt that this one would be any different, but it is. Everyone survives. The first days are a blur, you remember breathing fresh air again, listen to the leaves moving and you enjoy the feeling of the sun on your skin. You didn’t even realize how much you missed it. You hear shouting, words of other people living on the ground and your heart makes a leap, what if he lives on the ground? Two minutes later you see him, his hair isn’t sleeked back like Yán’s and it isn’t as long as your boy’s hair but his eyes are still dark with the twinkling stars inside them. You feel shaky and you grab Harper close. “Who is he” and you point at him. She grins and punches your shoulder. “you got a crush on Monty eh Miller?” And you start laughing and you can’t stop. Faith has been pulling your leg again, you should’ve known by now that this boy would be your rock, _your mountain._

You keep your distance, it’s irrational you scold yourself but you’re afraid that if you’ll talk to him everything will turn to ashes again. You find out information about him everywhere you go. It’s almost a game to find out more. He’s from argo, super smart and an engineer until he got locked up in the skybox. He’s sixteen, only one year younger than you and after you found out you had to bite your lip to stop your giggle from slipping out. 

Even though you don’t really talk to Monty, shit goes down anyway. Turns out grounders are real bitches and Earth isn’t what you expected or thought you knew. When you think everything is lost you decide to talk to him. 

“Monty, right?” You try to sound subtle but he grins at you as if he knows that you know a lot more than just his name. “Bellamy wants me to know what berries are toxic.” He raises his left eyebrow and your tug on your beanie. „you know, just in case.” “Of course-“ he grins “-just in case.” He explains everything to you and after an hour you know more about berries than you ever wanted, but he stared at you with those dark eyes that always seemed to smile and they took your breath away. 

He disappears that night and you want to cry, you should’ve known you scold yourself. Only when you get taken by the mountain men you realize that his disappearance isn’t your fault but you can’t shake off the unease. This place is too good to be true and your glad that Clarke seems to be wary and with her follows Monty. 

You talk a lot the first two weeks in the mountain, he glances at you and holds your stare a lot longer than is necessary but you don’t mind. Jasper is busy with good-girl-turned-bad all the time so Monty sits with you a lot, Harper keeps winking but you decide to ignore the menace. You regret calling her that when she disappears, you try looking for her and you almost choke when you hear that Monty too, disappeared. You’re ready to destroy the mountain, let them all burn to get him back, you have gone over bodies before, you’ll do it again, for him.  _Always for him_.

When you think back about the last two days, you only remember flashes, short moments that are engraved in your soul and will haunt you more than anything else. You remember finding Monty next to a dead body and all you can think is  _‘I’m so happy it’s not yours’_. You remember killing guards, the fight against the guards when they chain you up in the dorm like pigs for slaughter and you can recall only one thought during everything.  _‘I’m glad he isn’t here to see me die.’_

It goes quickly after that, Clarke kills the mountain, you can see the exact moment the radiation slips through its concrete walls. You feel guilty for those who were willing to die for all of you but they were living on borrowed time. You hug your dad when he frees you, it’s liberating to see him again but your still looking around you. Where is Monty? 

Only when you’re all out of the mountain you see him, he’s hugging himself as if he’s afraid to fall apart. Your father gives you a push. Go his eyes say. Go to him. So you go. You cup his face and kiss him, he tenses and than clings to you, his arms hold on to your waist, his tears wet your cheeks and his lips are chapped but you continue kissing. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

Two months later you spill everything. The two of you climbed on top of the remaining bits of the Ark to look at the stars and he’s lying in your arms breathing calmly and very much alive. „This is the longest you’ve ever been with me.” you mumble in his shoulder. He’s confused and you take in a deep breath and you let everything go. He holds you when you start shaking, the horror of 1964 makes you feel scared and his arms feel safe. He cries softly when you tell him about the hospital and he kisses both your cheeks when you talk about the ending. „I was glad you weren’t with me that time. I couldn’t bear the memory of you dying.” He kisses you softly.

“We’re alive now aren’t we?”

You are, and you plan to stay alive for a long time

**Author's Note:**

> (1839/1883/1964 are happenings based on historic events. The Chinese in the first part is google translate. Shān is Chinese for mountain and Yán means rock in chinese. I’m a sucker for ridiculous details.)


End file.
